How the past has shaped the present

Good morning everyone, I want to talk about something that I have been kicking around lately. I would like to discuss how my past has shaped my present. The reason I’ve been thinking about this is because I have been reflecting on many memories and experiences that I have had in my life around the holidays. Another reason why I have been so reflective is because I have had a number of reminders lately that life is a fragile thing. Recently my grandmother was diagnosed with cancer unexpectedly, as well as an acquaintance of mine had a dear friend pass away out of the blue for reasons unknown. 

These events in addition to the holidays have given me reason to look back on how my past has shaped me into the man I am today. First in my reflections that I always think about is my family. I am extremely blessed to have a loving family. As I look around I’ve noticed that this is becoming much rarer. It is not unheard of to hear about someone who is no longer talking to their parents or someone who doesn’t keep in touch with their family. This is so abnormal to me because it is rare that I go more than a day with out some form of contact with mine, whether it be a text, a call, or email. I am grateful for the love that my family has taught me. There hasn’t been a time in my own life where I doubted for a moment if they loved or supported me. 

I can recall countless memories of hanging out with my family where I have had fun or a new experience. I still to this day remember going to kings dominion when I was about 10 years old, and riding the SkyFlyer. It is very similar to bungy jumping. What a rush that was, I can still recall my Dad asking me if I was ready for him to pull the release. As he pulled the first time nothing happened, then with the second tug we were off. 

As for our family vacations, I was always secretly happy that I had a Sister when I was younger. Sure we had our squabbles but what siblings don’t. I was always grateful to have someone else to annoy, or someone else take some of the attention of Mom and Dad from time to time. She was always extremely talented and still is. She amazes me at how quickly she can pick things up. For example she learned how to sew over Christmas in order to make a wool bird ornament for my Mom. 

Speaking of my Mom, she has always taught me to do my best. She is also responsible for some of my cleaning habits. I always respected how my Mom would take care of things. She was never one to take things for granted, and I admire that quality her. I want to instill that quality in my life. I know there are times when I give her a hard time about her power cleaning ways but deep down I am grateful for her dedication to details. Early in my life I would half way clean my room and she would remind me that if I was going to do something half way then I shouldn’t do it all. 

Throughout my life I have come into contact with a great deal of people from all walks of life. Some are people I’ve known since I was born as in the case of many family members and close family friends. Some I have been friends with for a long times as in my friendship with Spencer and his family. Others I have only known for a few years; however, some of these people have had a grand impact on my life. The people I am talking about are some of the friends I met at college. 

Just so I can give you a mental picture of how I was before college. I can recall a week before I was supposed to move into my dorm that I told my parents that I was thinking of just staying at home and going to the community college. I was scared to death at leaving the comforts of my home and family. They encouraged me and said that it was not an option.

So fast forward to move in, it was an extremely rainy day and we had to move all of my stuff up to the 6th floor of Sullivan Hall. My roommate Brandon had already moved his in and was on a retreat for the Park Scholarship that he received. As my parents left, I felt completely alone. I was so happy to see Brandon the next day when he returned. He invited me to meet a few of his friends that he had met at the retreat. I can remember this loud curly headed girl named Stephanie. I remembered thinking that this girl was a little crazy, but nonetheless very nice. I am glad Brandon introduced me to her. We are still good friends today. I will always credit her with me passing Calculus, as she was kind enough to tutor me. 

Then in my sophomore year I met two exchange student from New Mexico State University named Eric and Kelsey, the later would change my life for the better. Eric was a really easy going guy who was fun to joke around with and hang around. I will credit him with my love of Jimmy Fallon. I still keep somewhat in touch with him today.

Kelsey on the other hand, I developed a special friendship with that grew into something more. There was something about this girl that was different and I liked that. She was innocent and very free spirited in the way she thought about alternative lifestyles. She really cared about others and was willing to have less in order for others to have a better life, I loved that about her and still do. Anyways I remember how she didn’t have class on Fridays and we would always spend the mornings together. We would watch How I Met Your Mother, go play basketball, and yes I did try and impress her with some half court shots. Anyways I can still to this day, recall countless memories and details about our time together. 

Then there was my position with the basketball team. I was a manager on the NC State Basketball Team. This position really helped me get out of my comfort zone. I have seen more parts of the country and the world because of the trips that I was lucky enough to go on. There were countless times that I was frustrated with my position with the team, whether it was only getting 3 days off for Christmas or having to be in Raleigh for practice during Thanksgiving. Limited weekends and time to get school work finished. It was a demanding position; however, I am extremely glad I stuck it out. I met some great people while I was a manager including other managers that shared in the sacrifice as well as players and coaches. I’ve gotten to rub elbows with legends in NC State’s past to name a few, David Thompson, Chris Corchiani, Rodney Monroe, Julius Hodge, and Tom Gugliotta. I am extremely grateful for all the support my family and friends gave me to stick with it. 

All of these people and experiences has helped shape me into the person I am today. It is very funny how certain things stick out to me now. For example prior to my sophomore year in college anything related to New Mexico would of been over looked;however, now those things stick out to me. Whether it be a license plate, a transfer truck, a zia, a kokopelli, New Mexico State Aggies, you name it it sticks out to me. All of these things remind me of Kelsey. 

So how can I appreciate the past without living in the past? It’s a question I am still trying to answer. I think what I am moving towards is being grateful for each day I have. Like I said early life is fragile. I want to try and enjoy each day I have. I want to take the time to look at the sunrise. I want to stop and smell the roses. I don’t want to be stuck on the hamster wheel in pursuit of worldly things. I want to experience all the sights and treasures this beautiful planet has to offer. I guess that is why I am willing to live more simply than most. I don’t want to be tied down to a big mortgage. I don’t want work until I am 62 just so I can have a giant house and many possessions. 

As I look forward into the future and the upcoming New Year. There are couple of things I want to work towards in 2014. 

1. Put people first 
2. Work towards bettering myself 
3. Get Financial Advising started 
4. Experience something new

I challenge each of you who read this post to reflect on the past and look at how many opportunities you have been given. Focus on what you do have and don’t dwell on what you don’t. I promise you that you will be happier. I want to wish everyone a Happy New Year. It is totally up to you if it will be your best year yet.